[Myr's ears twitch at the sound of the chair being moved. He thinks he knows which one that is, and that he'd left it out of place, and it provokes a twist of guilt along with the gratitude to hear L reposition it.]
You didn't know, [he says, quietly, to the apology.] That it would hurt that much; I didn't know. It wasn't your fault.
[A pause ensues, and he huddles down further in the quilt. Very little of his pain recently was L's fault and it's selfish and awful of him to flinch from those tiny pieces that are, hurting them both. But he can't seem to help it, any more than someone could help recoiling from a hot stove.
Quieter, still,] It's forgiven. And--you--needn't be sorry about that. You had larger things occupying your time.
[Saving people. Some of them people Myr's own foolishness had imperiled. Though even in his current mood that level of self-pity--in the face of the Bonded who's come back to him with every intent of helping him--evokes a frisson of self-despite, and he pushes himself to sit up a little taller.
Manages somehow to find a smile and lift his ears a little.] But I am glad you're here--though I don't know--I'm sure this will pass, now that Circle's dealt with and everyone's back safe.
[Which sounds like he's undermining L's efforts, doesn't it? Stupid, stupid. He cringes a little at himself and pushes on,] But I will sleep easier, [he hasn't been sleeping much at all,] to know there's nothing else clouding my mind.
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You didn't know, [he says, quietly, to the apology.] That it would hurt that much; I didn't know. It wasn't your fault.
[A pause ensues, and he huddles down further in the quilt. Very little of his pain recently was L's fault and it's selfish and awful of him to flinch from those tiny pieces that are, hurting them both. But he can't seem to help it, any more than someone could help recoiling from a hot stove.
Quieter, still,] It's forgiven. And--you--needn't be sorry about that. You had larger things occupying your time.
[Saving people. Some of them people Myr's own foolishness had imperiled. Though even in his current mood that level of self-pity--in the face of the Bonded who's come back to him with every intent of helping him--evokes a frisson of self-despite, and he pushes himself to sit up a little taller.
Manages somehow to find a smile and lift his ears a little.] But I am glad you're here--though I don't know--I'm sure this will pass, now that Circle's dealt with and everyone's back safe.
[Which sounds like he's undermining L's efforts, doesn't it? Stupid, stupid. He cringes a little at himself and pushes on,] But I will sleep easier, [he hasn't been sleeping much at all,] to know there's nothing else clouding my mind.